I wish it was a piece of lettuce stuck to the roof of my mouth...

...it was a layer of skin instead. Oh lovely.
I also managed to flash my knickers to just about everyone I walked past today in the village thanks to the bad combination of a cotton dress and the sea breeze.
Oh, and I managed to go for lunch in the place who declined work for me this summer (despite working for them for years) and would've looked less desperate and bitter if I had gone in there on my hands and knees, begging for shifts.
I can't even have my daily 2.30 brew either, my mouth hurts.
Right, I'm staying in from now on. I'm safer.